I have been ill since Thursday night. Even as recently as last night, I spent most of my evening on the toilet, liquefying my assets, as I believe Phyllis Diller once described it.
This morning, my daughter woke up a bit earlier than normal. I brought her into my bedroom and proceeded to change her out of her diaper. She looked at me sympathetically, and then she spoke:
"I'm so sorry you're sick in your head."
What? I thought. Which of my imaginary friends have you been talking to??
Violet seemed to reconsider her statement, and then corrected herself: "I'm sorry you're sick in your butt."
Ignoring my aching stomach for the first time in days, I laughed...